Wednesday, October 14, 2015

We Quit Potty Training & Other Things I Haven't Said


Hi! It's been a while. Sorry for that.

I'll start here: a few weeks ago I posted a photo of a new Jamberry manicure I put on and joked that I "am not a quitter" because I was going to finish the whole container of Oreos. For the record, I couldn't finish that container. Do you know how much sugar is in Oreos? Couldn't do it.

Well, that and other things makes me a quitter. And apparently makes me a liar too.


I'll say it slowly. We. Quit. Potty. Training.

IT FEELS AWESOME. Having our two year old in diapers is a comforting, wonderful sense of home that gives me peace. Taking him to the potty every waking moment of the day was exhausting. Cleaning up human feces from every (white) carpeted surface in my home with a newborn in my arms (or wailing on the ground next to me while I scrubbed) was making me lose my sanity. So....we quit.

The reason we started potty training to begin with was because LW wouldn't keep his gosh dang diapers ON. So we thought, "Oh! That means it's time to potty train." And it was six weeks of pure HELL. Then we went back to diapers and he started stripping them off...again. So we tried to potty train...again. Still failed.

Now he's successfully been back in diapers a month-ish and it's such a relief.

I just felt like I needed to share that with you, in the spirit of full-disclosure.

Here are a few other things I would like to share:

I was pro CIO with LW, but it's completely different with Mo. If he cries, my whole heart breaks. Not having postpartum depression makes having a baby completely different. Like, whoa.

We have lived in our new home just over a year now. HOORAY! Hubs finally fixed the lock on the front door. Which stuck in the locked position pretty frequently. Know how awkward it is to try and sign for a UPS package but not be able to unlock the door...while my dog is jumping and trying to lick the package out of the UPS man's hands and I yell through the door "SORRY!!! LOCK'S STUCK. HANG ON. SORRY. STILL CANT UNLOCK THE DOOR. SHE'S FRIENDLY. SORRY." Pretty awkward. But maybe that made up for the security we lacked elsewhere. Read below.

And a week ago, Hubs fixed the lock on the patio door. That also hadn't work since we moved in, and allowed cold air to gust through it, making the family room really dang chilly. Our patio door doesn't lock with a PVC pipe anymore, people! CELEBRATE IN THE SECURITY WE NOW HAVE!! AND WARMTH!

Hubs recently received fresh salmon a friend caught, for free. He's always wanted to smoke salmon and since this was free so I said go for it. Note to wives: if your husband wants to do this, don't let him. The house stunk forever like smoked fish. Then when he cleaned out the smoker, it stunk again from the smoker parts. Now our fridge smells because he made macaroni salad with smoked salmon instead of tuna. I don't like smoked salmon. Not the taste, not the smell. Nada. Do not let your husband smoke salmon. Take the free salmon. Freeze it. Bake it. Sautee it. Serve it over rice. Do. Not. Smoke. It.

I sneak an entire Hershey bar every day, whether LW is napping or not. If he's not, I wolf it down in the laundry room while I pretend to do laundry so he won't question why I am back there. Mama needs a sugar fix to make it through the day. Judge all you want.


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